Boss Secretary Affair - The Temptations, The Leadership Crisis

Boss secretary affair is a common tale.

Some leaders, over time, tend to forget the nature of the relationship with their secretaries. They lose their heads, become intimate with secretaries, get submerged in leadership crisis, and lose their leadership authority and position. This has happened to religious leaders, business leaders, presidents, the rich, the noble, the aristocratic, and all kinds of leaders in all kinds of organizations.

A common fallacy is the tacit belief that boss secretary affair is a crime peculiar to male bosses. But there are also female bosses that have gone down and dirty with their male subordinates.

Yes, the most celebrated of cases have been cases involving male bosses and female secretaries and other female subordinates. But then, that is only because male bosses dominate the industry - any industry.

Back to the real issue.

Why do bosses disrespect their position by asking for sexual favours from secretaries and other subordinates of the opposite sex? Why do those in leadership position allow sexual intimacy to develop between them and their subordinates?

There are two obvious reasons.

1. They forget the nature of the relationship that should exist between both parties

2. They allow their emotions over-power their sense of reason

So, what kind of relationship should exist between a boss and members of the opposite sex in his team?

Simple . . . A business relationship.

Of course, good leadership practice requires that you use the power of emotional intelligence to improve the morale of your team members to achieve organizational goals. But, please, don't confuse emotional intelligence with romantic emotions.

A boss secretary affair happens when the boss fails to recognize the difference between business and personal romantic attachment. This should not be you.

The second reason for leadership failure in this respect springs from the first.

When a leader lets down his guard and becomes emotionally and romantically attached to his secretary or other female employees in his team, his emotions will sooner or later overwhelm his sense of reason.

Sooner or later, he will start a secret relationship with his female subordinates believing that it will remain secret forever.

Don't kid yourself.

When a boss-subordinate love relationship affair kicks off in the office, the boss loses his authority over that employee. She will begin to take you for granted. She will begin to act callously because she knows you can't fire her.

And why can't you just fire her when she starts to mis-behave?

I guess you know that already.

Oh, yes. She can let the cat out of the bag. She can blow your little secret to the open. And you know you could lose your job if she does. So, you live with her rubbish much against your wish.

She has started blackmailing you!

Guess what? That is just the beginning.

Other employees will wonder why you're unable to discipline her. And then it will begin to dawn on them that you have been compromised. Then you will begin to lose their respect too.

What a living hell!

My friend . . . a boss secretary affair is not worth it. It's a ticket to self-destruction.

My advice?

Maintain a business relationship with your subordinates. Be fair, be just, be firm . . . be the leader.

You will be respected and valued by both your subordinates and your bosses.

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